The Dreaded Question
Soo…… What do you do?
This is my dreaded question. Do people really even care, or is it just the go to normal question? My mom and I were talking about this the other day and her answer is easy, a teacher. Humans are always sizing each other up. It’s natural, it’s annoying. Society approves such an occupation as my mothers and sees it as honorable, professional, and perhaps noble. And then there’s my answer… I’m a fridge moving, surf instructing, model/actor, brand ambassadoring human who is looking for work and in reality hasn’t worked in a month. Ugh, the judgement. The stigmas. Gross.
I have been using a different conversation starter that is often way more interesting, relatable, and fun. “What do you do for fun?” It’s amusing watching people geek out on what they do and it’s much easier to talk about! Especially if you can add to the conversation by knowing a thing or two about it. Next thing you know, instead of b.s.ing how interested you are in this new person’s banking career, y’all found out that you’re both Star Wars geeks and next thing you know she’s funding your venture to start a new Jedi Master training school.
I used to have “Professional Fun-Haver” in my bio. I liked it, despite it’s cheesiness. This bio worked as a social contract. It reminded me that I’m the light-hearted, fun, optimist guy. I like being that guy. It’s a choice to be that guy. I don’t always wake up in a great mood, but putting that in my bio it somewhat made me bound to make the choice to be stoked. I changed it because I don’t know how other people perceived it. It might look “unprofessional” to some people. And I’m trying to work too. Or it could just be overly cringeworthy like when I see “motivational speakers”. I don’t know. I changed it to “_____”. Now I’m not labeled. But ya, I’ll admit, that’s a label in itself.
Labels
Some labels live in the head, while some are on your name tag. The outside labels, such as job titles or social media bios, contain critical information about who you are and how successful you are. Status. This status will immediately establish a hierarchy between peers. I don’t know about y’all, but I immediately feel it if I have a lower social status then other people in the room. But this isn’t what is important.
What matters most is the internal labeling. Your internal narrative will shape how you act in situations where you’re surrounded by more accomplished people. It’s great being the dumbest in room. This is how you learn. But you’re not going to go anywhere if your internal label reads something like, “I’m an ugly, poor, depressed loser who couldn’t even get a promotion at Chik-fil-a”. By labeling yourself like this, events will reinforce your ideas about yourself. So if you didn’t get that job you will blame it on being ugly, poor, depressed, etc. If you flip that narrative and instead see yourself as a charming, stoked, up and coming professional, you’ll see the failed job interview as a learning experience and that there is a better fit elsewhere.
Labeling yourself can also close your mind. It can limit your thinking if not careful. It can also turn you against people before meeting them. Examples : Democrat vs Republican. Religion vs Religion. Culture vs. Culture. Feminist vs Manist? You see what I mean. Keep your mind open.
This feels a little woo woo writing this, but I believe there is profound truth in it. Changing your internal labels probably won’t happen overnight as it’s going to take a decent amount of working on thyself. So good luck! Or if you’re already crushing, keep crushing and stay the course!
Daily Stoke
Day 15 in Mex. Day #9 of writing.
Ladies and gentlemen, I had thee best churros of my life yesterday. No I don’t have a pic, my phone was dead. And they weren’t even warm! Crunch on the outside, moist on the inside. Ohhh but wait. They stuff whatever kind of stuffing you want in there. I opted for one strawberry and one chocolate. So fire. I couldn’t believe it. I’m going back for when them things are fresh next time.
Yesterday featured some decent stoke. Wandering, working out, writing, and practicing espanol. There was an Air Pod commercial being shot right outside of where I’m staying. I sat there and watched for a while. I love commercials. There were well over a hundred people on set. Most, as usual, doing nothing. Just looking for something to do. I love it. Controlled chaos. It sounded like a British team directing a cast of people from all over the world with a Mexican production team. Beautiful chaos. I love it and I wanted to be part of it.
However, yesterday also featured very scary moments. That was closest I’ve come to defecating en mis pantalones (without actually doing it). Something has been up lately in the estomago. I’ll spare you details, but it was code red. I was lost. Phone dead as per usual. I can’t figure out this city because I have no ocean to orient to. I thought I made it when I burst through a Mcdonald’s door at about 10:30 pm, but to my dismay, they had no bathroom. I thought they were lying as I put on my best puppy-dog face and begged, but they had no bano. A farmacy, a KFC, and a parking garage later, my bowels were still filled. Until I spotted it. A hole in the wall, with a restroom sign in the back. I sprinted in ( well as fast as I could go with regards to my situation), avoided eye contact, and busted open the door no questions asked. I made it. Barely. Walked out, head down and put my remaining 7 pesos in the propina jar.
Anyways. Happy Weds!
